Monday, 19 January 2015


So what is the meaning of this life? If not to stop and stare, look around you, shrug and not care?

Why are we NOT doing what makes us happy?
Do we even know?

Is it ever OK to sit night after night, staring at the telly or scrolling through endless mindless drivel on social media?
To start an argument with a stranger over a picture of a kitten?
To take things that aren't yours?
To deliberately hurt people?

I know not everyone does this, but those who don't seem like they are the few. If after work, college, caring (whatever your employment status is) Some go out and socialise with real live people, some take a class. But if we all just stopped and took stock, looked around and all of us just did that one (legal) thing that could possibly:

  • Change your life
  • Make you happy
  • Realise your potential
  • Break old habits
  • Change someone's life
  • Make someone happy
  • Help someone to realise their potential
  • Break off old habits for/with someone.
  • Examine every minutiae of your life to the exact point where you are now, and understand what it's going to take to change it. 
What would you do? Will it cost anything? Yeah, likely. It might cost dignity to say sorry. It might cost reputation to put yourself out there. It might make you rich in happiness or poor to cut off someone no good for your well-being.

Breaking old habits aren't neccessarily things you might habitually do. They could be people you keep going back to. There comes a time when you have to realise ex's are ex's for a reason, or the same tired excuse from the same person who treats you like a walking cash machine or a taxi.
Be ruthless. Cut them off. Say no. Do what you love. Be what you want to be, you want to write? Write. You want to sing? Sing. You want that promotion? Be early, work hard, ask for the promotion. Didn't get it? Ask why, ask what you can do to get it. Don't be afraid of your words, only be afraid of unspoken words. Do not get to your death bed and think "I should have done it..."

This will:

  •  Change your life
  • Make you happy
  • Realise your potential
  • Break old habits
  • Become who and what you want.

"It's NOT that easy!" I hear you cry. I know it isn't! I know! I can't say I know how you feel as that's an insult to you, I don't know you or your life. But I know mine. This isn't what I wanted. I have help to live my life, perhaps in the way you just do by yourself. Sometimes I'm OK, but in my own way. I have help to get dressed, I have someone to push my wheelchair as I can't self propel. I forget things, I have help to type. I am VERY fussy when it comes to that. All words are my own and I like them typed properly. It's also not such great fun having someone brush your teeth for you when your hands are locked up.
The word I hear thrown about a lot about me and people who need help everyday is FRUSTRATION. I get very frustrated. I can't grip things, I drop things, can't cook or bake alone. Can't get out the house by myself.  I get annoyed at small things, and of course big things too. I'd like to go to the theatre, but it takes 100 jobs just to do one job. I can't just book theatre tickets, I have to make sure it's accessible, and take discrete cushions to support me through out the performance. I can't sit there for 4 hours, travel there and back without considerable pain and locking joints and someone to take me. So I don't bother anymore. I haven't wanted to lock myself away, it's not because I've chosen to, far from it. I hate being a burden, I keep myself to myself and have few trusted friends. When they talk about frustration, it's usually over other people's actions, laziness being one recurring theme. Another theme is the reaction to a persons sheer ineptitude, offering them help after they say they need it and then refusing it, offering advice when asked for and not acting on it, causing them to skid from one disaster to another. Others (including me) are frustrated at a lack of respect and honesty from people you love, who are supposed to care about you, lying to your face while smiling and causing you massive problems.
Is it ever easy to just cut those people off? To stop helping? To stop being that familiarity they know so well?
When you cut someone off, for all the right reasons, the sense of relief is enormous. You may feel guilt, but overwhelmingly, it's relief. No more being taken advantage of, no more advice ignored. No more picking up the pieces for someone who just lurches from one drama to another, and lie to lie.


Be more YOU. Be whatever it takes to be happy and stop accepting the things that frustrate you...And YOU WILL find you Have:

  •  Changed your life
  • Become happy
  • Realised your potential 
  • Broken old habits
  • Become who and what you always wanted to be. 
It's not about being cruel and cold, it's about self preservation and saving your sanity. Don't cut off people who really need you. I mean cut off those who drain you for their own good and own benefit, those who have negative and draining personalities, those who tap you for cash or a babysitter. You know the ones, who take a liberty and advantage of your good nature. Who smile at you while digging a knife in your back.

I like the new me. I'm still in pain, and my joints are messed up, but I can happily say "no" these days and not feel a shred of guilt.

Frustration? Do one.

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